National Football League

Sitters

Any Bronco vs. Chargers - Kyle Orton iffy with an ankle. Backup Chris Simms iffy with a football.

Justin Forsett - I wouldn’t start any RB vs. Minny with your team. No, really. That’s why Forsett’s in this Sitters section. It gets better after this week - Rams, 49ers, Texans, Bucs - so this is a one- week benching.

Jay Cutler - On pace for 30 INTs. That’s Testaverdian. You thought you were getting a Transformer but Mom went to Kmart and got you a Gobot.

Lee Evans - You: “I think I’ll start Lee Evans. Two TDs last week.” Me, Mike D, MCA, Adrock: “You’re scheming on a thing that’s a mirage. I’m trying to tell you all it’s sabotage. Duh. Duh. Duh. Duh.”

Laurence Maroney - New math! One fumble at the goal line > four straight games with a score. Bienvenue le chateau bow wow.

- Via Tony Reali’s Weekly Fantasy Column

“We need a touchdown here, but let’s not be in a hurry to score.”

— Peyton Manning, on what he said in the huddle to his teammates with a little under two minutes left in Sunday night’s game and the Indianapolis Colts starting a drive at the New England Patriots 29.

The look on the San Diego Super Chargers fan is probably the same look on your face right now. Sheesh, with fans like that, the Seattle Seahawks don’t need any opposition from the stands. Good lord.

“I’d like to apologize to all the fantasy football players out there. Sorry for taking the knee.”

— Jacksonville Jaguars running back Maurice Jones-Drew, on his heady, once-in-a-career play, taking a knee at the 1 in the final minute of the Jags’ win over the Jets, so Jacksonville could run down the clock and kick a field goal to win without giving New York another possession.

“That fourth-down play, that’s one of your best plays, and you go to one of your best guys,” Brady said. “We’ve got our offense on the field. We have over 450 yards of offense at the time. We’ve got a lot of great players on our offense. They stopped us.”

“We tried to win the game on that play,” Belichick explained. “I thought we could make the yard. We had a good play, we completed it. I don’t know how we couldn’t get a yard.”

Fearless Prediction

Chris Johnson for 250 vs. Buffalo. His 6.7 yards a carry are a Joey Lawrence Whoah. Buffalo’s 175 yards allowed per game are a Keanu Reeves Whoa. This has the potential to be a 40-point week. If you’re going up against Johnson I’d wear a helmet and get ready for some woe.

- Via Tony Reali’s Fantasy Football column

Although he’s literally saved lives and is regarded as one of the top position players in the NFL, Atlanta Falcons TE Tony Gonzalez thought he was allowed to appear naked with his flaming hot wife October (her name even sounds like a stripper’s) in an ad for PETA. Let us be clear, this is not allowed! Leave the nude modeling to your wife, and stick to catching those rockets from Matty “Ice” Ryan over the middle.

It’s no secret that the Green Bay Packers offensive line cares nothing about pass protection, or even Aaron Rodgers protection, hell, any kind of protection. Turns out the good folks over at Madison.com, also noticed this and made a pretty nifty tracker on the 37 sacks the Pack’s have allowed. Depending on what team you’re a fan of, it’ll provide endless hours of joyful entertainment or uncontrollable weeping.

Gerry Callahan of the Boston Herald has written a excellent piece concerning Tom Brady vs Peyton Manning as we enter the annual battle between the New England Patriots and the Indianapolis Colts this week. It doesn’t lean to one qb over the other, rather it sets up the body of work both men have created thus far, and the legacy each one carries on their shoulders. If this article doesn’t get you excited for their sunday night match-up, you are clearly a Cleveland Browns fan.

Manning is 33, Brady 32. Manning is halfway through his 12th season, Brady is in his 10th. Neither shows signs of slowing down. There are no puzzling Delhomme-like dips in their bodies of work, no Romo-like questions about their priorities, no Roethlisberger-like off-field issues.
They are in the spotlight as much as any modern-day athletes and yet never seem to say or do the wrong thing.

- Read the complete article at the Boston Herald

winstonwolfe:

After witnessing the instant replay debacle in the SEC btwn. LSU & ‘Bama yesterday, Chad Ochocinco attempts to bribe the refs to get a review of his catch right.

(this is not a joke nor photoshop, Estaban was actually walking around the field with a dollar bill in his hand)

slippy:

My coworker Armando made this. I think it works.